I think they thought I was just trying to protect my trio of cousins from the responsibilities of fatherhood, but I didn’t mind that sort of rumor b...ecause the truth of spreading my legs for a revenue agent was a whole lot less appealing tale to explain my less than immaculate conception.Fortunately, things died down on the home front and my cousins got all-fired hot over giving me heavy duty action in my heart-shaped bottom. I didn’t object too much because any action was better than no action. By anyone’s standards, that was tactless. Only the most dim-witted of his subordinates could fail to see nepotism at work.Still, you had to hand it to the guy, he knew how to throw a party.I was in my sixth year of membership in the Society, and that meant a lifetime trip on the gravy train. You need two things to get in; a penis, and the kind of fortune most human beings don’t even know exists in private hands. I made mine the hard way, building and selling oil tankers. I bet against myself. ”“Why not?”“Cause I’m not gay. I don’t find niggas attractive.”“Well, I’m not a nigga.”“True! But I ain’t never thought of no dude as sexy.”“I understand. I’m different.”“That’s an understatement!”“I guess it is,” giggled Puddin.“What were you doing out at the bar tonight,” inquired the bouncer as he popped open another can.“My coworker was having a birthday party that was a hashtag-fail,” admitted Puddin.“Oh, okay! Well, you certainly caught everyone’s attention.”“It’s usually like that. ‘I would love to Jake but I’m just about to close shop. However, I work tomorrow, same time. Come on by and we can have a chat.’ Lauren’s eyes danced at the thought of Jake coming by again. A little disappointed that they couldn’t talk now, but understanding of the work Lauren had to get done, he agreed. ‘Expect me tomorrow Miss Lauren. I want the same treatment the little old man gets!’ Jake smiled broadly, showing his perfectly white straight teeth..
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