. I mean, what do you do now that Mom's not here?... I mean, do you have sex with other women?" JACQUI!" screamed her sister, "Mommy just died." I kno...w Dani, I'm sorry Dad. God, it's just that I miss Johnnie so much, I miss his body next to mine, touching me, I'm sorry I shouldn't have said anything," she said, her voice tailing off into a whisper."Nonsense honey," I said, putting my hand over hers, "You'll always be able to talk to me about anything." But do you believe in sex without love. ?" Mark, my God... stop this vulgar show!" Jean confusedly managed, trying to raise herself upright, her firmly rounded young breasts quivering and swaying with the effort. Momentarily, her smokey-blue eyes rolled to show their whites as she struggled, moving between her nakedly stripped husband and Carol whom he was intimidating! "Stop it, you hear! Cover that... that thing up! You ought to be ashamed of yourself... !"In his rage, Jean's glazed expression completely escaped her husband's. They were black leather and had 5” heels. When she wore them she was actually taller than me. I thought that made her extra sexy.Two years after we were married she got pregnant. It was planned as we sort of mapped out our future. Now pregnant the sexy gear was confined to a bottom drawer. After our son was born it made a rare appearance but not often. Then baby number two, a daughter, arrived. Now I could say she would not have fitted into her “play” clothes but that would be not the whole. Luck of the dumb, I guess. For my last Javon fuck, I was most definitely on birth control.Riding back home in our little car seems like a new beginning in many ways. I don't know for sure what's ahead, but I feel like what I'm leaving behind for the moment gives me a whole new outlook on life and its possibilities. I can't help being amused at the way almost every black man I meet, or even that sees me seems to know there's something different about me. I get lots of smiles and meaningful.