There was seemingly no solution. March 2008 Reconnecting with my children was going slower than it should have. I decided that they resented my deser...ting them for five months with only one short trip home. I told Paige that I was going to make their birthdays a special occasion, but at the end of the day, I had to report that things had not gone as smoothly as planned. First, they wanted separate parties, which I vetoed, reminding them that it was a tradition to celebrate their births with. If he was an old boyfriend, what she and her brother had seen would make a lot more sense. Now, however, she heard that tone in her mother's voice that meant SHE was the one being interrogated, and that her mother wanted to pry information out of HER.Still, other than the fact that her mother did not seem to want to confess to what had gone on in the past with mister Smith ... what was STILL going on with him ... her mother's responses had been what Debbie would have expected ... caring. "Well girlies what happens now?" Demanded Lady Anne.The two sissies looked beseechingly at Lady Anne, "Please Lady Anne not in front of the ladies!" begged a sobbing Fiffie.Lady Anne immediately delivered a stinging slap across Fiffie face."What happens next girlies?" she demanded.A distraught sobbing Fiffie said, "You turn on our dildo butt plugs Lady Anne."The listening women wondered what Fiffie meant, a smiling Lady Anne noticing their questioning looks, said, "Turn round girlies."The two. I thank all of you.I don’t want to give this illness one bit of credit for anything but it’s destructiveness in my life. I have learned there are levels of pain that I never knew or even dreamed existed. I learned how a disability changes the way people perceive you. I know what it is to be pushed past the point of giving up. A place where you pray to die and mean it. I have been humbled and humiliated. It’s horrible.While it has wreaked havoc in my life I did manage to see some good and learn.