Take over, let her off the hook, and tell her I understood. But even though I thought I did, I didn't. Her trauma wasn't even about me. Her decision h...adn't been revoked at all, at least the one about me. She had simply made another one, which I knew nothing about, and which she proceeded, with difficulty to confess. Our tryst in the shower had only convinced her of something she had suspected about herself for a long time. She was a lesbian.Her dalliance was not part of some rebellious. .." I said in a monotone."You don't need to stop," said Allie softly. "You're having so much fun, and it's so cool to see you all excited."I started caressing her delicate labia.She lay back, grinning at me. "Mr. Smith! You really want to look inside? Oh my!" Oh, I..." This girl somehow knew all my forbidden fantasies."You wanna look inside. Where the pee comes out. You really do, don't you! It's OK, go ahead, you naughty man," she said softly."How do you know?" I asked with genuine. Although her time as Charleswas becoming more cloudy and distant, she suddenly remembered a time whenshe five years old and sitting with the woman she now thought of as herfirst mother to watch the 1964 pageant on their big black-and-whiteZenith TV. Charles had seen how watching the program brought joy to hismother's face, something that had been mostly absent in the weeks sincehis father had moved out.Young Charles had looked up at his mother and asked hopefully, "Could Ibe Miss America. I looked close but didn’t see Sedalia. I knew where it was on the map.I am so glad that I followed my dream and rode out across this big land. I never would have seen all of this, if I hadn’t left Sedalia when I did, and the way I did.We let the cattle wade through the Pecos and drink their fill. As they began to walk back out of the river, Mr. Charlie took the point, leading them north toward Colorado.Mr. John took a few of the cowboys to his ranch to gather his herd of ranch cattle. When they.