Talking of work, she could have been a model. Crikey, I could get her work, and well paid too, but she probably wasn’t that kind of girl!I asked he...r what she was looking for, then in broken English she said anything pretty much, housework or shop work being mentioned most. Turns out she is also looking for accommodation, and I can help her with that. She looks at me with emphatic interest, and starts excitedly smiling at me in the kind of way a girl might on meeting a favourite Rock Star.I am. “Holy shit.” I said.“That’s my way of saying thank you.” She whispered, “If you stay with me all night I’ll give you an even better thank you in the morning.”I felt like a kid trying to get to sleep on Christmas Eve after that. Eventually I did drift off to sleep but instead of having visions of sugar plums I was dreaming about doing some pretty despicable things with my friend’s significant other.When I woke up the next morning I tried to make a pot of coffee. This task was halted by the lack. I hadn't seen uncle Ed during the past eight years, and when I saw himagain I was pleasantly surprised and aroused as I had just found out that Iwas attracted to big, burly, mature men, no twinks like me, thank you verymuch (well, maybe with the exception of my new jack off buddy, Denny, butthen again, I had just discovered masturbation and I had to take what wasavailable).Anyway, here was uncle Ed, much bigger than I remembered, balding,unshaven, with a beer gut stretching his white t-shirt. You can play later,"Hailey said."This is sooooooo not fair!" Mason was sounding more and more like thegirl he appeared to be. I was having a hard time telling if he was justtrying to act the part or if his mind was slowly changing. He certainlywas acting a lot more feminine.At that moment Mason scratched his groin, shifted sideways and ripped apretty nasty fart.Alright, I take it back.Lady Gaga burst into song causing a few of us to jump. Another cellphone. Hailey's this time. She jumped from.