"I see skinnedknees from climbing trees and running after your brothers." She wipedaway a tear. "I see that little boy in Tommy and Alex. I see the... familyyou should have fathered when I look at them. I want you back... and whatought to have been." But I do have those things." No!" Laura said emphatically. "Not like this. Not as a dragqueen...giving yourself to a...man." She ran out of words. She stiffedand gulped for air. "I don't think God made a mistake in making you aboy."Ann listened. He told me that he didn't have a phone there but to come inside and dry off and he would get me a ride to his brothers house about a mile away. I went in his place and there were deer heads on the wall, along with stuffed fish, etc. The old guy handed me a towel and told me to get my clothes off if I liked and he would put them in his dryer. I didn't think that would be too cool so I told him thanks anyway but I was just fine.I started drying off best I could and went into the bathroom to take. "Sorry about that." I said, taking the cigarette. I took a long, slow,deep drag, then held the smoke in for moment before letting out a thickcone of smoke into the air above our heads.Mom nodded appreciatively. "Well, you sure act like a woman that's beensmoking forever. You're getting the motions down pat. Did you get thatfrom watching me?" Yes," I replied, taking another drag. "Well, you and some other olderladies I've studied over the years." I exhaled.Mom picked up the foundation and a. “What’s wrong?”“My ... my ... my older brother was only ten when he died because he needed a lung transplant too!” Her lower lip, quivering. She turned her head, crying into Abby’s shoulder. She put her hands inside her open coat and hugged her breast to breast. She rubbed Britney’s back and kissed her hair.“It isn’t fair. It just isn’t fair!” Britney repeated. “Now you guys know why I’m known as such a bitch. It’s because my brother should be alive and not me.”“I never knew,” Abby said,.