I dressed conservatively, but very feminine. Blue knit sweater, blackskirt, almost black stockings and black boots. Of course, you must haveunderwea...r with bows or lace or both and a proper fitting and matchingbra. Full make up with a wet pink lipstick. Always wear earrings andaccessorizing jewelry to give a more feminine appearance. I could passpretty well in public even. Some nights I would go out driving around.Usually I was too chicken to get out of the car, though.This particular week. Baba: 11:00pm sharp, no excuse, with this same dress, sari and blouse without anything under them.Me: impossible, Shekher does not sleep that early. Moreover, I am having periods (I lied).Ravi: don’t worry, then we will do with the other two holes of yours.Me: you sick bastard. I am not coming.Ravi suddenly slapped me, ‘you bitch, I will show you who sick bastard is’.Baba: don’t worry daughter, we will ensure that Shekher and others are well asleep by that time.Me: (crying) baba, u allowed him. "I am feeling tired and sick. I want to go home now," I said."Don't worry," Doctor Jordan says. "You may not remember what has happened to you, just as you may forget a dream. It will take some time before you feel well again. Movement is extremely difficult. It is better for you to stay here. You are home here, Branca." No I want to go to my home," I say. I tried to get up. I couldn't.Eva said, "Branca you are ours now. Our home is your home. You must stay here."I felt so weak. Doctor Jordan. She was in Toronto now, filming her second film. Already a supporting actress. The best I had been able to muster in the three years my seed money had lasted was a sex scene, without any lines. At least it was in an A movie, if not a box office success. This made me think of Roslyn Rogan again, and I looked out of the dining car window to catch another glimpse of her. But of course she had paraded on. I wondered if she was boarding this train. Wouldn’t that be a gas? Leaving LA with my tail.