He felt my hip and he was squeezing my love handles and I felt very shy and pushed his hand.He asked do you feel shy and he pinched my hips again and ...again and he was playing with me. He casually told me why don’t you come to my house. I asked why. He told that he will massage for me and my pain will go away. I did not speak a word and I just went with him. In his house he massaged me as if he was very experienced. He removed my clothes and he was massaging the back.I was highly aroused. No man. And that situation did not look to be changing.He read the ad again, and for the first time in what seemed like forever, he smiled.That morning, he’d used his employee discount and bought one of the cheap little phones sold by the gas station. The purple Jitterbug that now sat on the table, mocking him. The flier he kept folded in his pocket, where it seemed to burn against his leg with the fire of its purpose. He found himself fingering the paper often throughout his uneventful shift, feeling. Today was going to be a good day.I took the hallway down to the kitchen and was surprised to see Mom there ahead of me. Sitting at the kitchen counter, she was sipping at a cup of coffee.“I hope I didn’t wake you Mom.” I walked over to the fridge and opened it, peering inside. No leftovers, figures. All my sisters were night owls, there was no chance they had left me any of the pizza from last night as they usually came to the kitchen long after I was in bed to grab a snack.Mom mumbled. ”“Which is a big part of why you’ve started your subversive cell.”“Yes.”We spent another hour going over my relationship with Stephanie, and it was mentally and emotionally exhausting, so when Clara left late in the afternoon, I took a nap before dinner.December 23, 2000, Chicago, Illinois“Dad!” Birgit squealed when I walked into the house on Saturday morning.She nearly bowled me over trying to hug me, and her sisters joined in a few seconds later. I hugged them and managed to disentangle.