It can put an elephant to sleep in 10 minutes." "Is it safe?" I asked a little worried."Yeah!" she said too quickly, shrugging her shoulders which mad...e me doubt her but I knew we both needed each other's love tonight. At 9:30, I carried my groggy girlfriend to the bedroom. She was sleeping before I could put her to bed. I carefully removed her clothes and covered her with the bed sheets. Then, almost skpping, I went to the guest room where my mother was staying. I wasn't prepared for the site. And she'd made a remark about an article of mine.In the library, at the bibliography table, I thought I'd look in the most recent volume. "Singleton, A." had two entries: a Ford and a Haggard. The previous year listed a piece on A.E. Coppard, whoever he (or she?) was. And the one before that featured an article on Anna of the Five Towns and one on Wilde and Beerbohm. I decided that five items would be enough and took the elevator upstairs, where the entire floor appeared deserted.I hunted up. “Well, it’s simple. You do the flashing, I take the pictures, and I email them to you.”This man was pushing the right buttons. She would absolutely love to have pictures of herself flashing.“I don’t know,” she said. The man sensed victory, and he pressed on. He leaned in close to her.“You’re the hottest thing I’ve ever seen,” he whispered, “Let’s get some pictures.” She was silent but her hand shook as she finished her second drink. Bill ordered another round. She looked at him; he was about. " That was wonderful, thank you " Tony said, after Tony and I had done the washing up and we're now settled back on the sofa, Mavis sat in her armchair which she insisted was more comfortable.We talked a lot about political correctness and how it was ruining the country. Football and who we thought would win the premier league and how we would have to be k**s these days with the state of the world,until I eventually had to admit to needing the toilet after my fourth can.I intentionally left the.