Positioning my self in front of you I look down at you on the couch wondering if you have figured out my secret but your face gives nothing away. Lean...ing over I make sure you have a clear view down my shirt as I flip on the soft light of the table lamp. Lingering for a moment I feel your warm breath on my breasts sending a shiver down my spine before straightening again. “I have a surprise for you.” I state simply. Turning to face away I reach down grip the waist of my skirt pushing it down. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, affixed to your wall? Art.What do you call a man with in the middle of the ocean, with no life jacket? Bob.What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, in a pile of leaves? Rustle.What do you call a woman with a cheesy pelvic discharge? Candida.How does a dog, with a cleft palate, let you know that the mailman is here? He goes, “Mark! Mark! Mark!”So, this guy goes to the talent agent, looking for his big break. He takes his dog, introducing. “This is for your own good, you nasty slut. I'm training you. I'm teaching you to handle the pain. And I'm teaching you what to expect if you ever disobey me” I am in pure agony right now. My nipples feel like they are about to be ripped from my body, my body itself feels like it's on fire, and all I can do is try to moan around the gag and squirm fruitlessly. “Shut up and stop moving! You aren't going anywhere, bitch!” With that he gives me a vicious blow right across my tits, causing me to. Y . ) mmmm then ~ without ~ me planning it ahead of time , she saw the wine in my hand and reached out to grab it from me and said " I will take this and thank you for thinking to bring some wine for us " when she bent down to get the bottle I quickly said " not without a proper hello you won't ! I let her take the bottle and now with both hands free , I grabbed her ass cheeks and pulled her to me , squeezing them and gave her a big kiss . I know that doing that had definitely caught her off.