" There's a bar just down the street," Bryanna pointed out, "We canwalk."After a minute, they all agreed to go to the bar, but when theyarrived, the m...an at the door took one look at Debbie and shook his headno. "Sorry girl," he smirked, "But you have to be twenty-one." I am over twenty-one," Debbie protested in surprise.The man just laughed, "Sorry cheerleader, but you don't even lookeighteen. Unless you can show me a driver's license, a REAL one, youain't getting inside."Debbie looked down at. “Very well,” he said. “Do you love me, Evan?” she asked. He was shocked and quite surprised with the question. “I certainly treasure our time together,” he said carefully. “But, do you love me?” she pressed him. “You’re quite obviously very attractive,” he said. “I find you extremely attractive.” Emily sighed. “That’s not what I asked you, Evan,” she said. “Do you love me?” “You are quite dear to me, Emily,” he responded, obviously uncomfortable by the directness in her line of questioning. She. My willingness to violate myself overrode my desire to make God happy to the point that I was willing to put myself through the pain of autofellatio. I wanted to let religious life go. I thought I could just move on and accept myself the way I was. But I found quitting self-righteousness just as difficult as stopping my dirty daydreams. I would pleasure myself in the darkest ways I could imagine at night, and the next day lead my peers in worship of a God I no longer understood. Part of me. Suffice it to say I stayed busy with picking up the twigs and tree branches that had dropped over the winter, burning them in the fire pit. I also raked the last leaves from the previous fall and created clouds of smoke by throwing them on the burning material in the fire pit. During the day I talked for a while with the neighbors on either side of my place. Steve and his wife live on one side of my place. They're senior citizens who live full time here on the lake. Jim, who is about ten years.