She knew she had to end this, before she too, fell into an abyss of psychological guilt from which she would never emerge, yet she realized she was si...mply not strong enough, physically or emotionally to reject Lamar and the licentious relationship he demanded. Besides, she admitted to herself, the boy was good... very good and she was finding herself sexually satisfied every bit as much as Lamar.Oh, she had tried. The next day, following their tryst at the motel, after Jamal had left for work,. The wholething is bigger than my bedroom at home.?Where?d all this stuff come from???Bought by different nannies over the years. Gifts from Father. Ican?t even fit into three quarters of the stuff, it?s that old. Therest is ? ugly. Sometimes, I?d rather wear those stupid schooluniforms ? not the one you fixed, that one?s great ? I mean, I likewearing it, it?s not stupid ???It?s okay, I understand what you mean. After we eat, you can show mearound the place, then we can come back here and we can. Her mind told her it only felt longer than it was, with those bitting shoes and the asphyxiating ball, and the blindfold that left her in the dark. Her legs began to shake. She could not stop the shaking. How dare she think about sitting down. She would not sit. Could not sit. Her body screamed at her to sit down where she was, but her mind forbid her. She knew had she sat down, she would not be able to stand in time, before He returned home. And a sitting slave girl would cost her, her flesh.. Kirk continues with, “That's great Matthew, so here's the deal. You come every week to mow—rain or shine”. “Rain”? “Ya, even rain—we'll just come back here on the patio and go straight for the dick down, lol. You do this every week, I figure about 20 mows. If you agree to that, then after you clean up a bit, we will hop in my car and go down to Carlise's. As it turns out, I know him. And we will get you your jeep. Today—right now, on you birthday, just like you wanted. I'll annie up whatever.