She felt so ashamed and humiliated but could do nothing to stop this.She wasn’t sure how long it lasted but she let herself just react for as long a...s it did trying not to think or feel the shame. She only realized it had stopped as she felt his fingers gently push open her lips and she heard, felt and smelled her wetness as his fingers became as wet as she was. The next thing she felt surprised her. She had expected him to push his fingers inside her. In fact she prepared herself for that and. I couldn't..." What happened Beth?" I asked calmly."Yesterday I ended up with nine demerits for pooping my panties in thedining hall... I don't know what happened to me... I couldn't hold it atall!"She sniffled and I felt my heart breaking for her. "I'm sure someone..." Probably... but no one cares about that Cameron... After that - well Ionly had one left..." She sniffled again. "I thought about it all nightlong, and this morning I decided I was better off giving StudentServices a chance," she. Feeling indecisive about something that shouldbe so clear to her was a new feeling and she wasn't sure how to handleit.When she was James, she had very rarely had this feeling, but now shefelt like this feeling of helplessness and indecision was drowning her.Was that something next for her as well she wondered? It seemed like itmight be. If she was going to become a woman like that, then it stood toreason that her real problem right now was that without a man to makethis decision for her she. The machine had markings, but I really couldn't figure out what they meant. As I tried harder, I started to feel great pain from my chest. I thought of my heart, but it was not possible, it was too superficial, I felt somehow asphyxiated, but it was different from being without air. I flashed hard once again and found myself on the floor of the diagnosis unit. The doctor was trying to wake me as I talked."I am alright... I guess I just lost it for a few minutes, what happened?" As soon as I.