Claus confirmed. "What good's a vibrating dildo without batteries? So that settles that—one of the new Unicorn Hummers." But wait," Santa said, exam...ining the stock. "What color? Seems they come in silver and gold." Oh, that's right," said Mrs. Claus. "Hm." Her keen eyes carefully regarded the Hummers, the sleekly smooth shafts gleaming in workshop light. "They're both very attractive." So let's just say gold," Santa said, about to toss the gold Unicorn 3-Speed Hummer into his sack.Mrs. Santa. For the next hour I tried to find some excuse to be near her but nothing happened, just as we was all leaving the place, the aunt started to fold the garden chairs saying she'd put those in the shed in case some rain would come. My father in law offered to help and after looking my wife I also said I wanted to help. So my father in law said since there are your strong hands he'd rather enjoy another drink with the aunt's husbandI was shaking, the chance to be with her came unexpected, I felt. And...wondering what it would be like to...to...uh...you know." To fuck them?"Mom asked.I was amazed to hear such a blunt question from her and especially using the "F"word. But I definitely did not want her thinking that we were gay. I'd rather she thought anything else. "Yeah,"I replied. "That's it." You weren't planning to have some girls drop by, were you?" Oh, no, Mom. We don't even know any girls that would." Then why the vaseline?" We didn't say anything, just stared stupidly at her. Mom. "E'ya, this is all wrong! This ain't rightat all! I shouldna be wonderin what Lady Ann will be doing! I am LadyAnn!"And then it all came back to him and in a wave of horror he realised whathad happened - how long he'd gone acting exactly like Burt - thinking hereally was Burt - forgetting that he ever was a lady!"I'm not Burt! I'm not Burt! I'm Lady Ann!"His heart rate was spiking, his breathing rapid as he realised how miredhe'd become; and then it came back to him what he'd been doing in.