Liz came barging into the room with a cup ofcoffee and in a cheery voice like a PE teacher boomed, "Come on girlshake a leg, you're wasting the mornin...g."Eveline moaned as though she had a hangover as Liz threw back thecurtains and sunlight streamed in. "Give me a chance Liz honestly. Whattime is it?" she asked squinting at the clock. Groaning she exclaimed"It's only 8am! What are you doing here so early?" Liz smiled at her and said, "I just felt like surprising you, I'vebrought fresh fruit and. In the morning, I will head back to Phoenix and arrive around 3 or 4 in the afternoon tomorrow.” He pointed to his truck and as I pulled the car up to his truck I said “Too bad you won’t be in Bakersfield earlier, my first night in town, I would fix you dinner to say thank you for helping me with my tire.” Before he could reply I leaned over and put my right hand on his thigh and gave him a kiss on his left cheek. It was not a peck, I deliberately let my lips stay on his cheek and I could feel. My wife looked at me with that look of disgust. I gave her my, "I'm sorry, I didn't know" frown. Then it happened. The drunk let out the biggest fart you ever heard. Phffffffttt.My wife gave me that, "do something" look. I jumped up and pulled the drunk off his stool and started shaking him saying, "I dare you fart before my wife!"The drunk looked at me and, scared as hell, he said, "I'm sorry, sir! I didn't know it was her turn."Toilet seats always seem to be a problem. I'll never know why, if. "Let's get on, the sooner we start the sooner we will be finished." Asit happened the work was fairly light and by mid-afternoon we hadcompleted it and sat down to a well-earned coffee in the kitchen."So what do you fancy for tea tonight?" Steak and chips." Oh I don't think we have that in." It doesn't matter I have booked a table at The Randolph." Which was alocal up-market restaurant. I could see she was hurt but trying to hideit but before she could say anything I added I took her hand and.