When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, “Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married.” The judge sa...id, “Me too.” Then I told him that after I was married, Sex left me. He said, “Me too.”Last night, Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me and asked, “What are you doing in this alley at 4 o’clock in the morning?” I said, “I’m looking for Sex.”My case comes up Friday.✧ ✧ ✧From the telephoneman i asked the. “About fifteen minutes,” I said. I raised my almost empty Lite and started to turn toward the kitchen.“Hang on there hoss, I’ll get it.” I nodded my okay to be served. Well, I am a cripple, and there are some perks, small ones, that even an asshole like me will accept without complaint or demonstration of false pride.“You’re fucking kidding me!” said Claire.“No, and I almost lost it when I realized what he was trying to say,” said Rodney.“Well, how do you like them apples,” she said. “It’s. At the car, mom got in giving me a little bit more of a glimps up her dress than what I got as she got in and out of the car before then, on the drive home I had the same view of her legs as I had gotten on the way to the restaurant, then again getting out, I got about the same glimps as I got when mom got into the car, as we were fixing to leave the restaurant.I escorted mom to the front door and while she kept her arm through my arm, I got the front door to the house open, then I let mom step. " What's up with you tonight? It's like you're not even paying attention to me." Look, I really am sorry, and I'll be more careful. I promise." You wish I was Karen right now, don't you?" What, no. Of course not." Well, then why do you keep looking over at her, and when you're suppose to be looking at me?" Umm, because I'm curious if she's having a good time or not." Well I'm sure she is. And see, she's smiling." At Todd, yeah, I noticed." Well you fixed them up together." Ah, no, I didn't do.
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